Asperger Fear of Surprises / Neighbor Brings a Gift

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THE INVADER / My neighbor showed up with this morning carrying a HUMONGOUS TV. Why? I guess he’s a nice guy. Now I can see the weather forecast for next week… Is the word FRIGID really necessary?

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I was happy with my tiny old Samsung because it was unobtrusive in my vintage décor – but what can you do when your neighbor presents you with a gift? For an Asperger this is an awkward social situation. I hesitated, stunned and confused. He set it up and vanished into his pick up truck and took off down the street.

Coincidentally, due to recent unrelenting “bad luck”, the sudden intrusion of this monster seemed fitting and positively American: no working plumbing, but I do have a giant TV. I had decided that maybe my life decisions have not stacked up well, and maybe I should try being really Zen, and welcome whatever passes my way. The doorbell rang…

Maybe the NFL on a giant screen will be fun – and hockey – and Ancients Aliens, and Vatican and UFO Conspiracies, the Hitler Channel,  and THE VIKINGS! WOW! This “gift” might have been sent by the GODS to teach me to be normal. I settled in on the couch.

Soon, it became obvious that the humongous TV could be an “indoor” social research opportunity, perfect for winter photo-studies.

Homo sapiens 30,000 BCE; Rocky Mountain Goat hunt.

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A flying tour over fascinating Wyoming towns:

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Fort Laramie

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Casper

And countryside:

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UFO landing site

And a surprising number of cowboy movies:

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And of course, FOOTBALL:

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CAM Newton, a DUD.

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Patriotic fervor.

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GRONK in the hospital.

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