I don’t know what other Aspergers dream: content, images, sounds, emotion?
The dreams that I remember over the past few years feature houses. These are specific detailed houses with many rooms. Rambling structures; very old, lived in, historical. My plan is to find one that I can ‘fix up” that is much larger than my real house, which is tiny. Or sometimes it is my real house, but with lots of extra rooms added. How did those get there?
“The House” is often in an unidentified foreign land, most frequently along a sea coast or a very large lake. The water is a significant color: deep cold blue – the color of ink. The land is hilly and covered with yellow grass. The town is tucked into a hillside with high tan walls around it. The houses are close within the walls, built from the same tan stone or mud with clay tile roofs. Could be many locations, but in my dream it is “home”.
There is always a problem: the house is for sale, but I have no money. (In real life, too.) But of course, the dreams are not about real houses; each is much too real to be real.
This idea or feeling of home is something that escapes me wherever I live. Where I live is a location: a town, a city, a place with housing, groceries, gas. The town in which I live in Wyoming has no significance. It’s the land and sky, the wind and dust and long vistas upon which physical forces play out that count. I’m surrounded by a theater of cloud, shadow, land and light. Is this place home? I am just camping here after all, as if I’m doing fieldwork and simply forgot to leave. I can’t think of a better place to live. After twenty years I still recognize how lucky I am to have landed here, whether or not it was an accident, good fortune, or desperation.
Perhaps the feeling of a lost home, or never finding home, is an Asperger thing?